As social beings, we are culturally and emotionally conditioned to look for love. We have an utterly unrealistic conception of love. We have this belief that love is redemptive meaning it can overcome all of life’s tragedies and tedium. Love is so much idealized in our society that we think it is a buried treasure. We are on our quest to find it. We are ready to go to the utmost extent to get that perfect love.
However, we believe that if we get it easy, it’s not love. We believe in working hard for it which is why we always tend to search for it in the wrong places. We are pining for somebody who treats us like crap whilst we are dismissing the feelings of somebody who can fight against the world for us. We look for people with a void we could potentially fill to eventually feel accomplished whilst completely forgetting the fact that we are not therapists/rehabilitation centers for people with issues. And such unrealistic expectation is only going to set us up for a lifetime of disappointment and dissatisfaction. And when the relationship is only about them, it starts taking a toll on us.
What we forget is we don’t necessarily need someone to feel complete. We were a ‘whole person’ long before that person walked into our lives. We need someone to inspire us to feel complete by ourselves. We need someone to support our directions and to encourage us to strive for bigger and better, basically someone who complements us.
Also, we need to believe that love can come to us easily just like that. It’s time to stop looking for it, and just see it right before us because love comes in various forms.